[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
pushed her psyche aside and taken over. It was as if he had asked permission, and once
in, molded himself around her, making them both stronger in the process. She felt safe
with him. Protected.
Eleanor. She heard him call to her. It was amazing. She could both see him with her
eyes and feel him in her head. His lips hadn t moved. He was communicating with her
telepathically.
152
Dyad Dreams
Yes, she said and heard an echo. Both her physical voice and her physic voice had
answered him.
He smiled at her and warmth spread through her. You do not have to speak with your
mouth. Only think something and I will hear it.
The first thing to pop into her head was embarrassing. She thought about how
handsome Christopher was, how attracted she was to him, to all of them. She could feel
herself blush.
Why, thank you, Eleanor. We all think Jacob is a very lucky man.
As soon as he said Jacob s name, thoughts of their lovemaking flashed through her
mind. Her embarrassment doubled and she tried to pull back from the link.
No, do not pull away, he thought to her. What you and Jacob feel for each other is rare and
beautiful. Something to be treasured and revered. No shame should enter into it. I will never
understand how humans took the most precious gift given to us and attached shame to it.
He cupped her face in his hands. Come back fully into the link. We must start our
journey to Con.
His hand caressed her face. At the same time, reassurance flooded through her. The
embarrassment melted away and she embraced the link.
Show me your link with Con. Concentrate on the difference you feel between him and me.
What separates us from each other, in your mind?
She thought of Christopher and how gentle and kind he felt. How he had made
linking with him so easy and painless. She forced herself to think of Constantine. Night
after night, he had invaded her dreams. No matter how hard she fought him, he always
drew her to the same place. His bedroom. She remembered his arrogance and brutality
as she had fought his hold on her. Fear flooded into her and she started to panic. She
couldn t do this. She wasn t strong or brave enough to face him again. Maybe she could
back out. They could find some other way, couldn t they?
I am here with you, Eleanor, thought Christopher. He will not harm you with me beside
you. All is well. His thoughts soothed her, took away her fear.
I see it now. I have the link, he said. Here it is, Eleanor. Can you lead the way to Con?
She concentrated and suddenly, she could see it. It was a corridor in her mind. It
started here with Christopher and led away to end in the dream bedroom. All she had
to do was go down that corridor, and she would find Constantine waiting for her as she
always had. In the bed with his face hidden by a pillow. Afraid, she hesitated.
You must lead the way, Eleanor. It is your link with him, not mine. Do not worry, I will be
right behind you. Trust me.
Trust again. Why did it always come down to trust with these men? When she
closed her eyes, the inner world came into sharper focus. The entrance to the corridor
was clearer now, and she started toward it, following the link in her mind. Cold dread
seeped into her as she found herself in Constantine s bedroom. She turned to look
behind her for Christopher, but he wasn t there.
153
Ann Hinnenkamp
What do you want here? Constantine said from behind her.
In the dream, Eleanor whipped around to face him. He wasn t in his usual place.
The bed was empty. Looking around the room, she found him in an overstuffed chair
next to a fireplace. The chair and fireplace were new to the dream world.
His eyes were closed and his head rested against the chair. He looked tired, beaten,
smaller somehow. He turned his head to her and opened his eyes.
Stepping back, she braced for what always happened next. Soon he would come for
her and the pleasure and pain would begin. He would start kissing and caressing her
and when she did not respond in kind, take his frustration out on her. A few moments
went by. He stared at her and she took a closer look at his eyes. The arrogance was
gone, replaced with pain and sorrow. She almost felt pity for him.
What s wrong with you? she asked.
You find me alone, my dear. The first time I have not had any interference in over
a month. I have no idea what has called them away, or how long it will last. If I were
you, I would take advantage of my depleted state and either kill me or leave. I do not
care which.
Hoping for some sign of Christopher, she looked behind her. She was alone with
Constantine. What could have gone wrong? They had no plan for this. No way of
getting away. Stall, she thought. Stall for time and hope Christopher shows up.
Who is interfering with you? she asked.
Constantine leaned forward in the chair and put his face in his hands. His voice
came out muffled between his fingers. A very bad man, Eleanor. He has shackled me
in every way possible. I thought at first I was the master, the one in control. He has
since convinced me otherwise.
He drew his hands away from his face and placed his elbows on his knees. In this
position, he looked like a tired old man. He raised his head to look at her.
Did David send you to spy on me? I would not have thought Jacob would let him
place you in danger. You reek of Jacob. Did he finally get around to having you? He
always did take his time. Was he worth the wait? A touch of his old arrogance crept
back onto his face. Are you his Balance, do you think? Will you complete him, and he,
you? Do you think you will live happily ever after? He laughed bitterly. Come see me
in fifteen years, or twenty. Come see me when you look like his mother, not his lover.
Let us test the Balance then, eh?
Hearing her own fears voiced by Constantine made her want to run crying from the
room, but she wouldn t give him the satisfaction. Not him, not after everything he had
done to her. Where was Christopher?
I ll take whatever time Jacob and I have and treasure it. A day, a week, one year,
ten years, I don t care. It will be worth the pain after.
All the arrogance left his face, replaced by longing. I believe you mean that. He
sighed deeply and settled back into the chair. Lucky Jacob.
154
Dyad Dreams
This wasn t getting her anywhere. She had to get out of this room and try to find a
way back to her physical body. In the past, she d been asleep and gotten back by simply
waking up. The one time she hadn t been sleeping, David and Jacob had pulled her
back. She had no idea how to do it on her own.
I was wrong, you know, Constantine said quietly. Wrong about everything. I
have broken with everything that gave my life meaning. Turned my back on family and [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
zanotowane.pl doc.pisz.pl pdf.pisz.pl ocenkijessi.opx.pl
pushed her psyche aside and taken over. It was as if he had asked permission, and once
in, molded himself around her, making them both stronger in the process. She felt safe
with him. Protected.
Eleanor. She heard him call to her. It was amazing. She could both see him with her
eyes and feel him in her head. His lips hadn t moved. He was communicating with her
telepathically.
152
Dyad Dreams
Yes, she said and heard an echo. Both her physical voice and her physic voice had
answered him.
He smiled at her and warmth spread through her. You do not have to speak with your
mouth. Only think something and I will hear it.
The first thing to pop into her head was embarrassing. She thought about how
handsome Christopher was, how attracted she was to him, to all of them. She could feel
herself blush.
Why, thank you, Eleanor. We all think Jacob is a very lucky man.
As soon as he said Jacob s name, thoughts of their lovemaking flashed through her
mind. Her embarrassment doubled and she tried to pull back from the link.
No, do not pull away, he thought to her. What you and Jacob feel for each other is rare and
beautiful. Something to be treasured and revered. No shame should enter into it. I will never
understand how humans took the most precious gift given to us and attached shame to it.
He cupped her face in his hands. Come back fully into the link. We must start our
journey to Con.
His hand caressed her face. At the same time, reassurance flooded through her. The
embarrassment melted away and she embraced the link.
Show me your link with Con. Concentrate on the difference you feel between him and me.
What separates us from each other, in your mind?
She thought of Christopher and how gentle and kind he felt. How he had made
linking with him so easy and painless. She forced herself to think of Constantine. Night
after night, he had invaded her dreams. No matter how hard she fought him, he always
drew her to the same place. His bedroom. She remembered his arrogance and brutality
as she had fought his hold on her. Fear flooded into her and she started to panic. She
couldn t do this. She wasn t strong or brave enough to face him again. Maybe she could
back out. They could find some other way, couldn t they?
I am here with you, Eleanor, thought Christopher. He will not harm you with me beside
you. All is well. His thoughts soothed her, took away her fear.
I see it now. I have the link, he said. Here it is, Eleanor. Can you lead the way to Con?
She concentrated and suddenly, she could see it. It was a corridor in her mind. It
started here with Christopher and led away to end in the dream bedroom. All she had
to do was go down that corridor, and she would find Constantine waiting for her as she
always had. In the bed with his face hidden by a pillow. Afraid, she hesitated.
You must lead the way, Eleanor. It is your link with him, not mine. Do not worry, I will be
right behind you. Trust me.
Trust again. Why did it always come down to trust with these men? When she
closed her eyes, the inner world came into sharper focus. The entrance to the corridor
was clearer now, and she started toward it, following the link in her mind. Cold dread
seeped into her as she found herself in Constantine s bedroom. She turned to look
behind her for Christopher, but he wasn t there.
153
Ann Hinnenkamp
What do you want here? Constantine said from behind her.
In the dream, Eleanor whipped around to face him. He wasn t in his usual place.
The bed was empty. Looking around the room, she found him in an overstuffed chair
next to a fireplace. The chair and fireplace were new to the dream world.
His eyes were closed and his head rested against the chair. He looked tired, beaten,
smaller somehow. He turned his head to her and opened his eyes.
Stepping back, she braced for what always happened next. Soon he would come for
her and the pleasure and pain would begin. He would start kissing and caressing her
and when she did not respond in kind, take his frustration out on her. A few moments
went by. He stared at her and she took a closer look at his eyes. The arrogance was
gone, replaced with pain and sorrow. She almost felt pity for him.
What s wrong with you? she asked.
You find me alone, my dear. The first time I have not had any interference in over
a month. I have no idea what has called them away, or how long it will last. If I were
you, I would take advantage of my depleted state and either kill me or leave. I do not
care which.
Hoping for some sign of Christopher, she looked behind her. She was alone with
Constantine. What could have gone wrong? They had no plan for this. No way of
getting away. Stall, she thought. Stall for time and hope Christopher shows up.
Who is interfering with you? she asked.
Constantine leaned forward in the chair and put his face in his hands. His voice
came out muffled between his fingers. A very bad man, Eleanor. He has shackled me
in every way possible. I thought at first I was the master, the one in control. He has
since convinced me otherwise.
He drew his hands away from his face and placed his elbows on his knees. In this
position, he looked like a tired old man. He raised his head to look at her.
Did David send you to spy on me? I would not have thought Jacob would let him
place you in danger. You reek of Jacob. Did he finally get around to having you? He
always did take his time. Was he worth the wait? A touch of his old arrogance crept
back onto his face. Are you his Balance, do you think? Will you complete him, and he,
you? Do you think you will live happily ever after? He laughed bitterly. Come see me
in fifteen years, or twenty. Come see me when you look like his mother, not his lover.
Let us test the Balance then, eh?
Hearing her own fears voiced by Constantine made her want to run crying from the
room, but she wouldn t give him the satisfaction. Not him, not after everything he had
done to her. Where was Christopher?
I ll take whatever time Jacob and I have and treasure it. A day, a week, one year,
ten years, I don t care. It will be worth the pain after.
All the arrogance left his face, replaced by longing. I believe you mean that. He
sighed deeply and settled back into the chair. Lucky Jacob.
154
Dyad Dreams
This wasn t getting her anywhere. She had to get out of this room and try to find a
way back to her physical body. In the past, she d been asleep and gotten back by simply
waking up. The one time she hadn t been sleeping, David and Jacob had pulled her
back. She had no idea how to do it on her own.
I was wrong, you know, Constantine said quietly. Wrong about everything. I
have broken with everything that gave my life meaning. Turned my back on family and [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]