[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
weather-beaten old building where they stored the camp canoes and rowboats. But aren t lovers
in books and movies always meeting down at the boathouse?
* * * * *
On my break from lifeguarding, I went to see Gunnar again in the camp store.
Hey, I said.
Hey, he said.
On my way over to see him, I d decided not to tell him outright about my plans. No, I was
going to get Gunnar hooked up with a girlfriend without his ever even knowing I was involved.
Guess what? I asked. There s this great big hornets nest in the boathouse. Gunnar liked
bees; I think he was fascinated by how orderly they are. I liked bees too, but not as much as I
liked movies like Gone With the Wind.
Really? Gunnar said.
Yeah. I ll show you. Meet me in the boathouse right after dinner.
Cool! he said, and I thought, Oh, this is too easy. It was just like, well, shooting fish in a
bucket.
* * * * *
I left dinner early and went to make sure everything was ready for Gunnar and Em s
51
rendezvous in the boathouse. It had been built on pilings above the lake, near the camp dock. It
wasn t much to look at on the outside pretty ratty and worn. It wasn t much to look at on the
inside, either full of canoes and rowboats, life jackets, buoy ropes, and, unfortunately, big
splotches of sparrow droppings (some a little too fresh). But the boathouse was enclosed on only
three sides, with two empty boat slips that were open to the water. That meant there was plenty
of privacy and a great view of the lake, which had settled into the perfect after-dinner calm. It
had been a dry spring, and there were forest fires in some nearby hills (which was not a good
thing), but the haze in the air made for an amazing sunset, with the feathery clouds awash in the
most incredible shade of orange.
On my way to the boathouse, I had picked some flowers from around the lodge. I d thought I
could set them somewhere in the boathouse to increase the romance factor. I immediately saw
the perfect place. I tossed them gently out onto the surface of the lake, and they lay there, slowly
swirling in the filtered light. Perfect! I thought. In a setting like this, even I d be into Em, and I
was gay!
Then I noticed a dead seagull in the corner of the boathouse. That didn t fit into the picture I
had in my mind of Gunnar taking Em in his arms and bending her backward in a confident, Rhett
Butler like embrace.
But before I could kick the dead bird into the water, I heard wood squeak on the dock outside
the boathouse. Russ? a voice said. Gunnar.
Shit! I thought. He was early! I had planned to be long gone by the time he and Em arrived.
If I was there, I d ruin everything.
One of the stored rowboats was covered by a canvas, so I slipped inside the boat and
crouched down under the cover.
Russ? Gunnar said, entering the boathouse. You here?
What was I doing, hiding from him like this? But I couldn t tell him I was there; otherwise
he wouldn t get together with Em. So for the time being, I decided to stay hidden under that
canvas.
I heard more squeaking as Gunnar walked around the boathouse.
Russ said there was a hive, he said out loud. But where? Gunnar talked to himself? This
was something I didn t know about him.
52
A moment later, I heard more squeaking on the dock outside the boathouse.
Russ? Gunnar said.
No, said a voice. It s me. Em, of course. She d entered the boathouse too. (Whatever
happened to people being fashionably late?)
Oh! Gunnar said. Hey!
What s up? Em said.
What? Oh, I m waiting for someone. He was going to show me a hive.
Did you find it?
No. Just a lot of sparrows nests.
Too bad, Em said. I love bees.
Really? Gunnar sounded surprised.
Oh, yeah.
Right on! I said to myself. This was going even better than I d expected! Better yet, Em
hadn t spilled the beans about my setting her up to meet Gunnar.
Hey, look! Em said. Flowers in the water.
Huh, Gunnar said. I wonder where they came from.
Em starting laughing.
What? Gunnar said.
I think I know where they came from, Em said. Your friend Russel. I think he s trying to
set the two of us up.
Oops, I thought. I really should have made Em promise to be more circumspect. But this
53
wasn t necessarily a bad development, romance-wise. If the two of them saw me as some kind of
outside manipulator, that might force them closer together. If nothing else, they could share a
laugh at my expense.
Unfortunately, Gunnar wasn t laughing. No, he said. Russel wouldn t do that. Not after I
told him not to.
I admit I felt a tad guilty when Gunnar said this. Just like I felt guilty eavesdropping on them
like I was. But what could I do?
You told him not to set me up with you? Em said to Gunnar, sounding understandably
offended.
It s not you, Gunnar said. It s me!
Sweet Jesus, he was breaking up with her and they d barely just met!
Oh, Em said.
That didn t come out right, Gunnar said. Look, I ve just had bad luck with girls, okay? I
told Russel I didn t want to meet anyone right now.
Oh. Well, I should get back to my kids, anyway.
I heard a pause, then some squeaking, like Em was walking for the door. But before she was
gone completely, Gunnar said, No. Wait.
I didn t hear any more squeaking, so Em must have waited.
What do you like about bees? Gunnar asked.
I dunno. They re just cool. You know, it s not true what they say about bumblebees being
too heavy for their wings that their being able to fly violates the laws of aerodynamics. Their
wings twist sideways, so there s less drag on the upstroke. That means they follow the laws of
aerodynamics just fine.
Yeah, Gunnar said. I know.
I mean, obviously, right? Because they do fly.
54
Hmm, I thought to myself. This was an interesting development. Was Gunnar snatching
victory from the jaws of defeat?
The floor to the boathouse squeaked again, like someone was pacing nervously (Gunnar, no
doubt).
You allergic? he said to Em.
To bees? she said. Yeah. I don t die or anything. I just swell up.
Me too.
Careful, Em said. Don t step on the seagull.
Huh? Gunnar said. Oh! I heard more squeaks little ones, like someone was stumbling
backward.
Then I heard a squishy sound, followed by a word that struck terror deep into my heart.
Whoa! was the word, and Gunnar was the one who said it. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
zanotowane.pl doc.pisz.pl pdf.pisz.pl ocenkijessi.opx.pl
weather-beaten old building where they stored the camp canoes and rowboats. But aren t lovers
in books and movies always meeting down at the boathouse?
* * * * *
On my break from lifeguarding, I went to see Gunnar again in the camp store.
Hey, I said.
Hey, he said.
On my way over to see him, I d decided not to tell him outright about my plans. No, I was
going to get Gunnar hooked up with a girlfriend without his ever even knowing I was involved.
Guess what? I asked. There s this great big hornets nest in the boathouse. Gunnar liked
bees; I think he was fascinated by how orderly they are. I liked bees too, but not as much as I
liked movies like Gone With the Wind.
Really? Gunnar said.
Yeah. I ll show you. Meet me in the boathouse right after dinner.
Cool! he said, and I thought, Oh, this is too easy. It was just like, well, shooting fish in a
bucket.
* * * * *
I left dinner early and went to make sure everything was ready for Gunnar and Em s
51
rendezvous in the boathouse. It had been built on pilings above the lake, near the camp dock. It
wasn t much to look at on the outside pretty ratty and worn. It wasn t much to look at on the
inside, either full of canoes and rowboats, life jackets, buoy ropes, and, unfortunately, big
splotches of sparrow droppings (some a little too fresh). But the boathouse was enclosed on only
three sides, with two empty boat slips that were open to the water. That meant there was plenty
of privacy and a great view of the lake, which had settled into the perfect after-dinner calm. It
had been a dry spring, and there were forest fires in some nearby hills (which was not a good
thing), but the haze in the air made for an amazing sunset, with the feathery clouds awash in the
most incredible shade of orange.
On my way to the boathouse, I had picked some flowers from around the lodge. I d thought I
could set them somewhere in the boathouse to increase the romance factor. I immediately saw
the perfect place. I tossed them gently out onto the surface of the lake, and they lay there, slowly
swirling in the filtered light. Perfect! I thought. In a setting like this, even I d be into Em, and I
was gay!
Then I noticed a dead seagull in the corner of the boathouse. That didn t fit into the picture I
had in my mind of Gunnar taking Em in his arms and bending her backward in a confident, Rhett
Butler like embrace.
But before I could kick the dead bird into the water, I heard wood squeak on the dock outside
the boathouse. Russ? a voice said. Gunnar.
Shit! I thought. He was early! I had planned to be long gone by the time he and Em arrived.
If I was there, I d ruin everything.
One of the stored rowboats was covered by a canvas, so I slipped inside the boat and
crouched down under the cover.
Russ? Gunnar said, entering the boathouse. You here?
What was I doing, hiding from him like this? But I couldn t tell him I was there; otherwise
he wouldn t get together with Em. So for the time being, I decided to stay hidden under that
canvas.
I heard more squeaking as Gunnar walked around the boathouse.
Russ said there was a hive, he said out loud. But where? Gunnar talked to himself? This
was something I didn t know about him.
52
A moment later, I heard more squeaking on the dock outside the boathouse.
Russ? Gunnar said.
No, said a voice. It s me. Em, of course. She d entered the boathouse too. (Whatever
happened to people being fashionably late?)
Oh! Gunnar said. Hey!
What s up? Em said.
What? Oh, I m waiting for someone. He was going to show me a hive.
Did you find it?
No. Just a lot of sparrows nests.
Too bad, Em said. I love bees.
Really? Gunnar sounded surprised.
Oh, yeah.
Right on! I said to myself. This was going even better than I d expected! Better yet, Em
hadn t spilled the beans about my setting her up to meet Gunnar.
Hey, look! Em said. Flowers in the water.
Huh, Gunnar said. I wonder where they came from.
Em starting laughing.
What? Gunnar said.
I think I know where they came from, Em said. Your friend Russel. I think he s trying to
set the two of us up.
Oops, I thought. I really should have made Em promise to be more circumspect. But this
53
wasn t necessarily a bad development, romance-wise. If the two of them saw me as some kind of
outside manipulator, that might force them closer together. If nothing else, they could share a
laugh at my expense.
Unfortunately, Gunnar wasn t laughing. No, he said. Russel wouldn t do that. Not after I
told him not to.
I admit I felt a tad guilty when Gunnar said this. Just like I felt guilty eavesdropping on them
like I was. But what could I do?
You told him not to set me up with you? Em said to Gunnar, sounding understandably
offended.
It s not you, Gunnar said. It s me!
Sweet Jesus, he was breaking up with her and they d barely just met!
Oh, Em said.
That didn t come out right, Gunnar said. Look, I ve just had bad luck with girls, okay? I
told Russel I didn t want to meet anyone right now.
Oh. Well, I should get back to my kids, anyway.
I heard a pause, then some squeaking, like Em was walking for the door. But before she was
gone completely, Gunnar said, No. Wait.
I didn t hear any more squeaking, so Em must have waited.
What do you like about bees? Gunnar asked.
I dunno. They re just cool. You know, it s not true what they say about bumblebees being
too heavy for their wings that their being able to fly violates the laws of aerodynamics. Their
wings twist sideways, so there s less drag on the upstroke. That means they follow the laws of
aerodynamics just fine.
Yeah, Gunnar said. I know.
I mean, obviously, right? Because they do fly.
54
Hmm, I thought to myself. This was an interesting development. Was Gunnar snatching
victory from the jaws of defeat?
The floor to the boathouse squeaked again, like someone was pacing nervously (Gunnar, no
doubt).
You allergic? he said to Em.
To bees? she said. Yeah. I don t die or anything. I just swell up.
Me too.
Careful, Em said. Don t step on the seagull.
Huh? Gunnar said. Oh! I heard more squeaks little ones, like someone was stumbling
backward.
Then I heard a squishy sound, followed by a word that struck terror deep into my heart.
Whoa! was the word, and Gunnar was the one who said it. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]